


stay warm

by artsyleo



Series: comfortember 2020 [25]
Category: EastEnders (TV)
Genre: Ben Mitchell Loves Callum "Halfway" Highway, Boys In Love, Comfort, Domestic Fluff, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Idiots in Love, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Post-Canon, Self-Doubt, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:49:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27717044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artsyleo/pseuds/artsyleo
Summary: comfortember prompt day 25 - going back to school/workcallum's first day at his new job after leaving the police
Relationships: Callum "Halfway" Highway/Ben Mitchell
Series: comfortember 2020 [25]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1995826
Comments: 2
Kudos: 57





	stay warm

**Author's Note:**

> very slight tw of a scar alluding to past violence but it's really nondescript, and small references to current canon
> 
> also i deliberately made this really nonspecific about his job bc theres general debate between paramedic/councillor/social worker and i love them all so you may decide for yourself heh

By the time Ben’s coming down the stairs, still cuddled in Callum’s sleeping gown - if anyone asks he’d say it’s warmer, less worn out but it’s obvious to anyone that knows him that it’s the closeness to Callum that he adores - the other man is already in the hall, dressed up smart. Ben’s got himself a day off today since he figured he’d be wanted around this morning, since he knows exactly what today is. 

It’s the culmination of months of Callum’s life being torn apart and put back together by his own hands, and Ben’s. A couple months of training, and revision, and convincing himself he’s not good enough, and Ben trying the best he could to combat all those thoughts in his mind. It’s all come to this- his first day at his new job. Ben knows he’s nervous, has felt the way he hasn’t been sleeping properly the past few nights and it puts him on edge, the situation a little too familiar for his liking. Of course, it’s not because of  _ what’s happened _ , and he just has to remind himself of that. 

By the time he reaches the bottom of the stairs he finds Callum looking at his own reflection in the mirror, and Ben can’t help but stop and stare- he’s only human, and the man is  _ beautiful _ beyond his own words. 

“Well hello there handsome,” Ben calls and Callum jumps a little, turning to catch Ben’s eyes in the mirror. A blush spreads across his cheeks, all the way up to the tips of his ears at the words in the way that Ben really loves. He lets out a small breath and their eyes break contact, when Callum turns to look at his feet. 

“Yeah? Not sure about this shirt,” Callum says, bringing a hand up to mess with the already perfect collar. Ben sighs and sees through the action like glass, understanding it for what it is immediately- a distraction, Callum’s way of putting everything he’s thinking, everything he’s worrying about onto something else. Convincing himself that there’s something else wrong so that he can focus on that instead of the day ahead of him. Ben  _ knows  _ him, almost better than he knows himself. 

Ben comes down the rest of the stairs and puts his hands on the tops of Callum’s arms, his chin resting on his shoulder- and he’ll forever deny the fact that he has to stand on his tiptoes to do so. 

“You look beautiful, babe, like you always do,” he says, if only to see Callum blush a little more, and it works. “But we both know that’s not really what this is about.” 

Callum sighs again and this time when he looks down at his feet it doesn’t have the same feeling to it, not when there’s a shake in the other man’s chest as he breathes in again. 

“I just- maybe it’s stupid that I’m this nervous,” Callum says quietly, embarrassment clear in him. “Maybe I should just forget it.” 

“Hey- no, come on,” Ben replies, a gentle hand coming to rest against Callum’s chin, a little pressure against it, urging the other man to look at him but it’s a request more than anything. Callum tilts his head back up anyway- nervous eyes catching Ben’s again and for a minute he’s taken aback, not for the first time, on how blue they are. “Cal, you’ve been training for this. You’re so good, anyone with eyes could see it. You’re gonna do great.”

“Just- what if-” he starts and then trails off, this distant look passing across his eyes and Ben knows in an instant what this is about, because it isn’t the first time. Callum looks like this every time he thinks about  _ what happened _ , and it kills Ben. He tightens his grip on Callum’s arm just a little, rubbing over the fabric until Callum’s eyes clear again. “What if it’s like last time?” 

Ben hates, almost more than anything, that this is something that Callum has to think about. That Callum now has those memories in his mind for the rest of his life, all because he’d been trying to defend Ben. Guilt burns through him every time its brought up and he’s sure the same runs through Callum- where that leaves them, both guilty and neither solely responsible, he’s not sure. 

What he is sure about though is that they’ve come out of the other side of it. It had been the furthest thing from easy, and Callum’s got a new scar to prove it- a little one, just curling through his right eyebrow and up towards his temple. It’s faded a little now where it was once a sharp white, bright even against pale skin- but now isn’t the time to think about that. 

The point is, they’ve made it-  _ Callum’s _ made it. Whatever’s come before has happened, and they’re learning how to live on the other side of it. 

Ben doesn’t think he’s ever been prouder of the man standing in front of him. 

“It won’t be, I promise you,” Ben says, and he hopes that the dead sincerity in his words gets to Callum, reassures him as much as he needs. “I promise you, you’re _safe._ It’s okay that you’re nervous but I think this will be good for you. You’re strong, and you’re smart, and you’re brave, and I think maybe it’s time you started to see that, yeah?” 

Callum looks down for a minute, and when their eyes connect again, there’s tears in Callum’s. He panics for a minute, wondering how he managed to fuck this up  _ again _ , but Callum lets out a little laugh and his own hands come up to rest on Ben’s jaw. 

“I love you,” he says, and Ben can hear in his voice that there’s so much more that he just doesn’t have to say, but it’s okay, because he understands. They’ve gotten better at that. “I don’t deserve you.” 

“Hey, that’s my line,” Ben laughs back, albeit wetly, because it breaks his heart that maybe there’s a little bit of Callum that actually believes that- how could it be true, though, when Callum’s the one who’s convinced him the opposite about himself? “I love you too, baby, so much.” 

He leans in towards the other man and Callum meets him halfway, connecting their lips together in a soft kiss. It’s fireworks, but then it always has been for them, right since the start. 

When they pull away, Callum’s forehead rests on his for a moment as he catches his breath, eyes closed. 

“I can do this, yeah?” he says softly, like there’s a chance he’s starting to convince himself. 

“Not even a question,” Ben says instantly. Callum pulls away to leave another kiss on Ben’s forehead, then pulls his hands away to catch himself in the mirror again. Ben misses the warmth of his hands the second they leave. He takes a deep breath in the mirror, closes his eyes for a minute, then turns back to Ben. 

“I best be off then,” he says, and now there’s excitement along with the nerves in his voice. 

“Yeah, don’t wanna be late on your first day,” Ben smirks. “I’ll be here when you get back, yeah?” 

“Yeah,” Callum replies. “I’ll see you later.” 

He starts to leave, until Ben catches his arm again and pulls him back a little. 

“One more kiss,” he whispers mischievously just before their lips connect. Callum pulls away laughing a little. 

“I really do have to go,” he smiles. “I love you. Thank you, for this.” 

“Not at all.” 

Callum smiles softly back at him, and there’s so much left unsaid that just doesn’t need to be spoken aloud, not when they know each other so well. Callum nods, then turns back to the door. 

“Bye!” he calls back into the house, before the door shuts behind him. Ben sighs with a small smile, walking back over to the stairs and in the direction of Lexi’s room. He could maybe get used to being a house-husband- if Callum was the one he got to call his husband. 

**Author's Note:**

> okay if we dont get fluff after all this shit in canon, like callum being nervous about stuff and ben just being in l o v e im going to scream also i want them to be husbands so bad  
> comments and kudos mean the world to me, i hope you enjoyed and lots of love to you  
> leo x (tumblr is artsy-highway)


End file.
